Tuesday, January 23, 2007

Pimp My Ride - Edicion Mexicano

After enjoying the splendor of Los Angeles for almost a month we decided it was due time to hit the road for our adventures south of the border. But any fool can just take off for Mexico without thinking twice about it. Thats not how we roll. We figured that since every person we love has expressed fear for our well being that we needed to take matters into our own hands and give Guntero (aka Guillermo) his full inspector gadget treatment.

First we began with the cosmetic. To blend in with the surroundings, thereby lowering our "rob me, I'm a stupid gringo" factor, we strapped decaying board bags and a second spare tire to the roof. The end result is one step closer to "Baja Bus" status.

Secondly we addressed comfort. The deserts and jungles of Central America are hardly comparable to the icy Alaskan tundra so we added our own Mexico version of air conditioning. Yes, it's an oscillating fan which we screwed to the ashtray. Simple but effective. I can already feel the sweat disappearing.

Steps 3,4,5...safety, safety, safety. First we rigged up the fish bat by the sliding door for all bludgeoning needs. (*idea courtesy of Jim Abraham)

See this harmless lil pen?

That's right you dont see it cause your eyes are burning from the pepper spray.

And finally, what could be better than the last resort knife strapped under our kitchen table. This is all Rachel by the way. I'm not picking a fight with anybody armed with a butter knife in hand. I'll stick to my hatchet, bat, and tear gas. In case you are wondering why we need all these weapons...to smuggle copious amounts of prescription drugs used to cure everything from "travelers diarrhea" to malaria. And where do we keep our valuable cargo you ask?

Where else except for our new secret compartment that we built under the back seat and covered with a nice inconspicuous carpet.

When doing all of these modifications its amazing what you can find in a 20 year old vehicle. That's right (see blog entry "pork paw and the hairy vents") Same hair, but for some reason it doesnt bother me so much this time. I think were finally ready to live la vida loca...without the vinyl pants and shaved chest.

Tomorrow is the big day, we'll be driving across the border from San Diego. Thanks everyone for all the well-wishing!


Anonymous Anonymous said...

I like that fish bat idea. I think it would be alot cooler if you take a soldiering iron and woodburn the "Whomper" logo into it. I'm in san diego so i can help you with that if you like. Maybe afterwards we can can hope in my Isuzu Rodeo and go pick up some turkey sandwiches. Let me know dude.

Paul Mitchell

1/24/07, 10:48 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey guys

I think the ellusion to the bat is racial profiling and frankly, I resent it. Not every Hawaiian is a moke, and not every moke is a Hawaiian. Don't Hate.

Just joking, i take pride in my semi moke status. Because sometimes Haoles need pound. Be safe and you guys better come back world class surfer, remember, we who are stuck in the day to day grind are lving virciously through you.


1/26/07, 10:07 AM  
Blogger kayhow said...

All I say is: Cuidado, cuidado, cuidado! I love you both, and I can now sleep at night knowing that the pen transforms into a WMD. Now that I blogged WMD, and with your detailed documentation of the other weapons, you may be flagged by the U.S. government. Be safe!
PS. If I knew how to type the upside down exclamation points, I would've. So it's my request that you find the answer to that mystery on your journey, and use them relentlessly in your subsequent posts.
!Gracias! (damn)

1/29/07, 10:34 AM  
Blogger Eric said...

You guys are so hardcore!

Viva la raza!

2/1/07, 9:35 PM  

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